I'm writting a VAMPIRE STORY!

Chitter-Box-Kat 04-03-2006 06:55 PM
Seriously, I am! Embarrassed Sweatdrop

I don't know if this is supposed to go on this sectiion of the forums, but I am currently writting a potential book and I am already up to the foruth chapter. Cool

As the title of this thread suggests, it's a vampire sotry. And I am having a bitching good time writting it! Big Grin

The title is "Child of Day/ Creature of Night". I even have a pen name! I's really cool. I might make a word game out of it...(shiftty eyes)

Feel free to asks questions about my story and make suggestions. Big Grin I might need some ideas if I get writters block. Embarrassed Sweatdrop

This is Chitte-Box-Cat, dreaming until her dreams come true!

LA-DU-LEA! (peace sign)
Generalissimo D 04-03-2006 06:56 PM
Hi-ho, hi-ho, to the Nightingale this goes.
Randolph 04-03-2006 06:57 PM
Don't worry, Chitter. I reported it already and it'll be in the right forum in no time.
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-03-2006 07:20 PM
(hangs head and lifts arm)

Thanks Randolph... Embarrassed Sweatdrop

Oh, and Zaphod Beeblebrox too! Embarrassed Sweatdrop
Nine Kuze 04-04-2006 03:55 PM
My question is is what is the story about? Its a cool concept because vampires are just plain cool but you didn't give any reference to your story at all in the first post so I just wanna know what that's all about.

And also, if you didn't post this in the Nightingale Forum in the first place, where exactly did you post it?
Peace.
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-04-2006 09:37 PM
Believe it or not, I posted it originally in the Library Of Lost Memories... Big Grin

I felt so stupid when my first two replies were telling me the thread would be moved to the Nightengale... Embarrassed Sweatdrop

Anywho, the main character of my story is a fifteen year old named, brace yourself, Tamerlane Vique. I make no joke. Her middle name Is Azusa, so her full name Is Tamerlane Azusa Vique.

The vampire in my story, or at least the main one, is named simply Ikol. He is more or less a split personality of Tamerlane's that lives in the back of her head.

He was a real person with a body and everything, and I 'm having fun making up a reason as to why he ended up in the back of Tamerlane's head. I made him Irish and if I remember corectly...387 years old. He's a Libra, born on October 17.

I found a rough draft of the first chapter and it turns out, I had origianlly planned to make Tamerlane the name of the vampire split personality. The teenaged girl vessle was supposed to be named Nillion.

Oh well! I like the version I gots now! Tommorow I'll start posting quotes form the first chapter. Or maybe the whole chapter itself!

Chitter-Box-Cat
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-05-2006 07:34 PM
Where the hell is everybody? Confused Frown

Anyways, I decided to skip out on the chapter posts for now. Instead, I'll pique the interests of the artists on this forum. I'll give a description of my two main characters Tamerlane and Ikol.

Feel free to draw pictures based on the descriptions! Smile

Tamerlane

gender: female

age: fifteen

nationality: American

height: five foot seven inches

hair: brunette and half-way down her back. Likes it out

eyes: violet

typical outfit: vest with colar, matcing pants, white dress shirt, black boots going halfway up her calves, and a scarf underneath the vest collar

nickname: Tammy

Ikol

gender: male

age: thre hundred and eighty seven (387)

nationality: Irish

height: five foot seven and a half inches

hair: black and half way down his back. Likes it in pony-tail

eyes: green

typical outfit: white dress shirt, black pants, riding boots of same color, and a maron jacket. This was back when he ahd is own body. While sharing Tamerlane's body, he wears whatever she's wearing at the time unless he decides to change outfits. Then it's as close to his typical outfit as he can get.

nickname: Louis or Louie

What do you all think? Smile Cool, ne? Wink What till I get to Loraine and Francoise and Mo-Kina! Big Grin And then I'll ccreate more characters to join the cast! Pleased

This is totally bitching. Ciao!

Chitter-Box-Cat
Nine Kuze 04-05-2006 08:09 PM
quote:
Where the hell is everybody?

I'm here! I'm here, dammit...

quote:
Believe it or not, I posted it originally in the Library Of Lost Memories...

Um... WOW. That's actually quite funny. Laughing

quote:
Anywho, the main character of my story is a fifteen year old named, brace yourself, Tamerlane Vique. I make no joke. Her middle name Is Azusa, so her full name Is Tamerlane Azusa Vique.

Actually, I really like the name. I not sure if I can pronounce it correctly but I do like the name. I'm a sucka for uncommon and complex names (since mine is like that as well) so that's a very interesting name and gets me interested in the character.

As for the characters, cool for putting up the physical descriptions and I like the split personality angle your pulling as well (that may have to do with me just recently watching Fight Club). With the vampire, I just hope that this doesn't turn into Interview with the Vampire with Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt. Because well, that was just a pretty bad directed and laid-out movie all around.

Anyway, nice job and keep it up Chitter-Box-Kat!
Peace.
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-05-2006 09:13 PM
I have the movie "Interveiw With The Vampire" on DVD. The only reason I watch it is if I need a vampire buzz or I just want to see Lestat. He's my favorite character in the WHOLE movie except for maybe Claudia. And that's only becasue she managed to slit Lestat's throat in that one scene. Embarrassed Sweatdrop

Back on topic, Tamerlane's first name is pronounced like it looks. "TAM-er-lane". Azusa is more or less "A-zu-sa". The a's are short. And Vique is pronounced "Veek". I think I got that right... >.>;

Ikol's name is pronounced "EE-kol". I plan to make it an alias he goe by. When people call him by his real name, it reminds him of how he ived longer than his family and friends. And not by choice, either. Shocked It makes him really sad. Frown

I wonder why no one else seems to be looking at this thread... Confused It's weird. Neutral

Thanks for talking to me! It makes me feel like I belong. Pleased

Chitter-Box-Cat
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-06-2006 05:40 AM
I swear I am NOT going for the whole "Interveiw With The Vampire"-type angle. Shocked

If anything, I'll end up swinging into the fantasy/ horror/ adventure kind of territory. Big Grin

It's the kind of stuff I go for.

I'd like to take this time to give out a few other charater descriptions. Only one, but she's an important character to me. Tamerlane's best friend.

Loraine

gender: female

age: fifteen

nationality: American

height: five foot seven inches

hair: dark blonde and just past her shoulders. keeps it mainly in small pony-tail.

eyes: grey with a little blue in them

typical outfit: white blouse, tie around the neck, pleated skirt going down to knees, short socks, and a clunky pair of boots

nickname: Lori

What do you think? She's been in on Tamerlane's secret with Ikol since Ikol first showed himself becasue when Ikol did show up for the first time, he scared Tammerlane to tears. Loraine is a Scorpio...OOH SHITAKE MUSHROOMS! Oo;

I should include birthdays for ALL of the characters...LATER. >.>

Ciao Nine XXVI!

Chitter-Box-Cat
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-06-2006 04:44 PM
I don't get it...how is it there are like hundreds of people on this forum...AND THE ONLY GUY WHO MANAGED TO REPLY TO MY THREAD SEEMS TO HAVE DISSAPEARED!?! Evil Evil

It's so...damaging to my ego...nobody cares about the new girl...wait..hold on...DOINK! O.o

Yup...my brain stopped. o.o

Uh...ANYBODY THERE!?

Chitter-Box-Cat. Feeling weird man!
Generalissimo D 04-06-2006 04:50 PM
Made ya look.

Tongue

Post the damn story already.
Nine Kuze 04-06-2006 05:02 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Chitter-Box-Kat
I don't get it...how is it there are like hundreds of people on this forum...AND THE ONLY GUY WHO MANAGED TO REPLY TO MY THREAD SEEMS TO HAVE DISSAPEARED!?! Evil Evil

It's so...damaging to my ego...nobody cares about the new girl...wait..hold on...DOINK! O.o

Yup...my brain stopped. o.o

Uh...ANYBODY THERE!?

Chitter-Box-Cat. Feeling weird man!

I didn't 'disappear' and yeah, when the other members don't visit and respond to your thread like the way to planned and visioned does hurt (the AAA's in my case) but hell, that happens and you just have to move on and continue to do your thing with the thread. Happy

quote:
Post the damn story already.

What my man Zaphod said. We get the jist of the story and what your going for. We're just waiting for the actual story to drop.
Peace.
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-06-2006 07:56 PM
Okay...okay...OKAY!! Sweatdrop

I have no freaking clue how to drop the file for my first chapter onto E-Mail...so I'll have to type the whole damn thing...DAMN. IT. ALL. Embarrassed Sweatdrop

I used specific fonts for Tamerlane and Ikol's parts. I can't find them on this thingy with the limited fonts. So I'll just put little signs before each change of veiw.

IF ANYBODY WHO READS THIS STEALS IT IN ANY FORM I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND BEAT YOUR THIEVING ASS SO BADLY PLASTIC SURGERY COULDN'T SAVE YOUR FACE!! Big Grin GOT IT!?! Big Grin

Just needed to get that out of the way. I'm very protective of what's mine. Wink Onward to the story!

Child of Day/ Creature of Night

(insert pen name here)

Chapter 1: Shadows and Sunshine

(Ikol's POV)

I can see the fear in his eyes. That pure look of terror as I use my powers to hold him in place. I take one of his hands and expose the wrist. The veins stand out, pulsing and pumping with blood. Sweet, delicious, needed blood.
As I move the wrist to my mouth I say, "Don't hate me. I do this only because I've no time to hunt rats. And they don't taste very good anyway."
The man faints. That's good. The less resistiance, the quicker my meal. My fangs cut into the soft flesh and the necter wine of life flows past my gums. I remove my mouth as soon as his heartbeat begins to slow. I lick my lips, drag the body into the trash pile, and bury it with, what else, trash. I know the body will be found in a day or two.
Tammy will probably chew my ear off in the morning...Ah well! I run back home over the rooftops and settle into bed, letting Tammy regain control before settling into a satisfied sleep.

(Tamerlane's POV)

The thing I hate most about Ikol, is that when he takes over, I see EVERYTHING he does. As the sunlight beams down on my face, I reluctantly wake up, still tasting blood on my lips. "IKOL!" I shriek in my head. "What have I told you about feeding!?"
His sarcastic, se la vie, who-give-a-good-godamned voice answers back in my head. "Not to do it without telling you first." It's routine for us now. Ikol goes out to feed onee a month, and this happens every now and then.
"Don't give me your apathetic attitde Ikol! You went out without telling me! Every few months you pull crap like this!" I don't really speak like tis out loud, but for Ikol, I will curse badly enough to make a sailor blush.
"Okay, okay!" He says. "If I said I'm sorry, would you stop yelling? It bothers me me when you yell ike that." One of the few things he's honest about.
"Maybe I wouldn't yell if you just tried to look before you leaped."
Ikol murmurred something I didn't quite catch. "What did you say?" I ask him.
He hesitated before replying. A rare moment. "I said 'I'm sorry'. I don't mean to be forgetful like that."
I sighed out loud and said, "I know, I know. It's okay to be forgetful. At least today's Saturday."
On that note, I shut Ikol out of my thoughts and procede to get out of bed and pick out clean clothes to wear. Nothing fancy, shirt, tan pants, matching vest and my trademark black boots. My accesory for the day is a red scarf my mom bought for me last Christmas. I tie it in a bow around my neck and set it under my colar.
My style is...well, take a little thrift store chic, add a dash of prep and sprinkle it with a personal touch, and you get the general idea.
Ikol calls me 'Tammy'. It's short-hand for my real name: Tamerlane. My full name is Tamerlane Azusa Vique. My mom is Mo-kina Chiron Vique. I never met my dad. Mom says he died before I was born. I've seen pictures of him. He and I both have soft brunette hair and tapered noses. My mother gave me her violet eyes, light, rosy complexion, and all-around tomboy nature.

AND THAT"S ALL YOU"RE GETTING FOR NOW. Big Grin

So...what do you think? THe whole of chapter one is four printer pages long. This was what was on the first page. I have four questions:

1. Like it or hate it?

2. Wanna see more?

3. Got any suggestions?

4. Do you think I'll really hunt you down if you try to steal my work? 'Cause if you don't...YOU ARE SADLY MISTAKEN.

AND NO STEALING MY CHARACTERS!! Mad I WORKED HARD TO GET THEM HOW I WANTED THEM. Mad

Ranting and threats aside, I really want to know what you think! As a budding author, any reviews and advice you can give is welcome.
Generalissimo D 04-06-2006 08:24 PM
Well, apparently my posts like to scamper off...

Flow. You must flow. For greater justice.

This is written like its being spoken, which makes me kinda cringe. See previous statement on that. Write it so you can switch from POV's and still keep going.
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-06-2006 08:57 PM
I have this major POV switching bonanza in chapter three.

And besides, what I posted ISN'T all of chapter one. Just a bit from the start of the chapter. The whole idea behind chapter one, for me, was to set a certain tone for the story any see the main human character's side.

Then I introduce more peaks into Ikol's dark, delightfuly twisted mind in chapter two. A few hints into his past...how he feels at the present time...that sort of thing.

This is the first time I actually tried to write something with more than one chapter...and I think it's pretty damn good considering my age. Oo

I'm working the fourth chapter right now. I think before I get about to finishing it, I'll outline the entire story so I can figure out how I want it to flow.

Besides, I have to come up with a fake witches spell that sounds authentic and come up with some scary ass stuff to go in later chapters... ^_^;

Ooh...I need sleep...I'll be back tomorrow. I promise by the oath of the Lancaster House. Wink
Generalissimo D 04-06-2006 09:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Chitter-Box-Kat
This is the first time I actually tried to write something with more than one chapter...and I think it's pretty damn good considering my age. Oo


Well, looking at your profile, I beat you by 5 or so months. So meh.

I've written some long junk, though not as long as others.

The Other Coast (and other writings.)

The BMWC Presents...The Black Forest...
Chitter-Box-Kat 04-07-2006 05:28 AM
I peaked at your stories Mr. Beeblebrox. NICE. Dueling Bigs and zombiies...what a way to start a day! Pleased

Spring break is coming up! This means LOTS and LOTS of free time. I'm going for story outline and sixth chapter or bust. Cool

Too busy right now. Gotta prepare to go on a trip so's I can present a project. Lordy Lou, I'll be wearing one of the few shirts own that actually has a collar. O.o

Guten morgen...TGIF....yada yada yada...I am so flicking bored. Sleeping I can can see myself now, dead for boredom. Dead But I'll bring my CD player. Maybe I wont die of boredom. I'll just take a nap...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Sleeping

Chitter-Box-Cat. Bored. Sleepy. Need caffine...

(walks off in zombie-like state saying "caffiene...caffiene...")