Worlds worst pick-up line

Fujiko 09-09-2004 10:58 PM
It's not clever at all, but some guy actually asked me this:

Hey, do you have a boyfriend?

After responding yes...

Are you happy with him?
Buck Buck #1 09-12-2004 03:53 PM
I had a friend who used this once, it didn't work...
Got any tacos? [No] Wanna make out?
Travis Bickle 09-12-2004 06:18 PM
How about this:

Hi. My name is (insert name here). I'm a convicted sex offender. Wanna dance?
Shaoblane 09-18-2004 01:58 PM
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me? *smack*
Travis Bickle 09-18-2004 05:46 PM
Are you going to the pants party?
MidnightLight 09-18-2004 06:37 PM
Now, noone's actually tried these on me, because noone will seriously flirt with me. And because they didn't use these I'm glad.. *tear-sniff* (I'm so alone--WHY WON'T ANYONE LOVE ME?!?!?!..) Oh, you're still here. These are what I was talking about :

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

Is that Windex? Because I can see myself in your pants.

I love every bone in your body - especially mine.
(If you don't get this, consult Umino or DoD. I get the feeling they do...)<No hard feelings, dudes..> *Heh heh, Heh heh--"Hard", Heh heh, Heh heh-- "Feelings" Heh heh....

The word for the night is legs, let's go back to my room and spread the word.

Hi, my name is Skippy, like the peanut butter I stick to the roof of your mouth.

Just call me milk, I'll do your body good.
_____________________
For more things like this, *sniff* and more stupid stuff: http://andybauch.tripod.com/index.html

Go to Miscellaneous Stuff, and the scroll down until you see the link...*runs away to cry*
Serenity Wayneright 11-28-2004 02:22 AM
I work at the PA Renaissance Faire so here are some of the more idiotic ones I've heard and some that the guys I work with have tried (and failed with...lol!)

"Want to polish my sword?"

"If I really were a wizard I'd make your clothes disappear."

"Want to wench me?"

"Want to see my wizards staff?"

"Do I get to put the money in your cleavage now?"

Mostly from drunk guys I might add...idiots. Roll Eyes
pen1300 11-28-2004 11:53 AM
quote:
I work at the PA Renaissance Faire so here are some of the more idiotic ones I've heard and some that the guys I work with have tried (and failed with...lol!)

FWEE! You work at the PA Ren Faire?! I've been there! Last time I was there I performed during Middle Eastern Weekend...but that was a while ago...

Anway, enough time has passed since this pick up line (back in Sept):

"I love your name. Wanna come to my dorm and play with some things?" (While he was playing with some handcuffs, don't ask why he had handcuffs, I don't know and don't really care).

Few days later and he used the "Angel fallen from heaven" bit. Roll Eyes

Later,
Pen1300
o55goten 11-28-2004 12:06 PM
My favorite two are

"Does this rag smell like chlorophorme to you"

"I forgot my number want to jog my memory with some sex"
Pygmalion 11-28-2004 12:16 PM
quote:
Originally posted by pen1300
Few days later and he used the "Angel fallen from heaven" bit. Roll Eyes

A friend of mine would call that down to passing women (they'd smile), then his roommate would add, "too bad you landed on your face!" (the boyfriend would make threatening gestures).

Pygmalion
Sephiroth 11-28-2004 01:34 PM
"If you were a laser, you'd be set on STUNNING"

Or, for the long winded approach:
*Grabs Girls Hand*
"Now, This is a bunny *places finger on girl's palm* and he wants to get across a river*draws imaginary line across palm*, but he can't because the current is too strong, and he can't jump over the river because it's too wide, and he can't go around the river because it's too long."
"So, how does he get across the river?"
"I don't know, I just wanted to hold your hand"
*SLAP*
Lady Tesser 11-28-2004 04:30 PM
An ex-boyfriend of mine once commented as he stared at me: "I'm SO fascinated by the female anatomy." (He is now a squid researcher - evidently, I seemed to have looked like a female squid.)

I had put this in one of my novels in which the characters are working at a Ren Fest: "My Lady Undine, every second of every hour of every day is like a thousand knives of fire stabbing me in the heart. I long for thee incessantly, so much that mine sorrow seems without surcease. My alliteration is small comfort next to the warm gaze of thine silver eyes. I crave the comfort of thine embrace like some lost child, cold and alone in the dark. So, you wanna [CENSORED]?"

My favorite Ren Fest pick-up line is: "Wench, you've the finest pair of child-bearing hips I've ever seen - buy you a pint?"

And PCT's favorite when we're in public: "Wanna come home with me, little girl? I've got some candy ... " Or this one when we're in public: "Quick, run home with me before your husband finds out!"
Benjamin 12-28-2004 03:53 AM
Smile ) The Worst Pick Up Line Ever Smile )

"Your prettier than any of my other previous girlfriends..."
***Girl Tries To Talk***
"Shh, Ninja Turtles is on"
***Guy Starts Singing Theme Song***
Avenir 12-28-2004 01:26 PM
My uncle used the following on his current girlfriend the night they met:

"Would you like to go for a ride on my motorcycle?"

He meant it literally as they were discussing their motorcycles, but she mistook it for something else. Let's just leave it at that, but they've been together for eight months now.


Watch Night at the Roxbury for several bad pick-up lines. Such as:

"Excuse me, may I look at your shirt tag? Just what I thought, made in Heaven."

Scene ended with the guy getting slapped, I believe.
Shaoblane 12-31-2004 10:51 PM
HOW TO PICK UP CHICKS!
...or at least get them to beat you...

1. Hide cell phone
2. Approach chick, tell her you lost it, ask her to call it.
3. You have her number.
4. Tell her "thanks, now I have your number." Big Grin
Shaoblane 05-22-2005 03:00 PM
Worlds cutest pick-up line.

"Does this rag smell like chloraform to you?"
BethMcBeth 05-22-2005 03:20 PM
"Hey I saw how you were riding that horse wanna come over and ride with me?"

"Hey I think your tractor is sexy"

"So you got any kids?"

"Hey I saw you in last class and realzied that when that bell rang it was you!"

Blahhh
Travis Bickle 05-22-2005 03:33 PM
"Are your parents retarded? Because you look like a special girl..."

Nothing beats that.
Lady Tesser 05-22-2005 04:01 PM
"Hey, you're one of those actresses! So, are you really gay or would you like to disprove it with me?"

(An audition workshop classmate related that line used on her from when she went to drama competition.)

Of course, the classics around the group I hung around with in high school:

"Baby, I'll sell you a +5 Jeweled Condom - " (RPG reference.)
"So ... are you into anthropromorgic stuff?" (Means humanoid animals.)
"Are you a Virgin?" (Rocky Horror Virgin.)
"Can I feel those?"

And one I used: "I am your Goddess - now make your offerings."
Shaoblane 05-23-2005 07:01 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lady Tesser
And one I used: "I am your Goddess - now make your offerings."


Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin *writes down*