| Lady Tesser | 12-05-2003 10:45 AM |
Several people have started threads doing Big O crossovers with particular anime, but nothing quite covering ALL anime. Some of us only have little scenes we think would be funny - true one-shots that will only be done once with a particular anime/manga.
This thread is for those who like the crossovers but not the commitment!
* * *
Roger (getting into Griffon): All right, if you want to visit Gordon Rosewater -
Dorothy: I do wish to visit him, Roger Smith. Take me.
(They drive to Ailesberry Farm. Gordon is sitting in his rocking chair on the porch.)
Gordon: I see you're back, Mr. Negotiator.
Roger: I have some questions -
BLAM!!!
(Roger blinks. Dorothy is holding a Czech357. Gordon's head has a rather large hole in it.)
Roger: Dorothy! You shot Gordon Rosewater!!!
Dorothy: Mr. Smith, I had a bounty on this clown for ages - he's wanted in Illinois for the fiasco involving the Hunts and Ragu Spaghetti Sauce War a few decades back, seems he's been doing a Soylent Green with his tomato farm.
Roger: Huh, who, what - ?
Dorothy: Oh, sorry. Name's Rally Vincent. *pulls mask off to reveal she is indeed Rally Vincent from Gunsmith Cats* I'm a bounty hunter from Chicago. *into radio* It's okay, May, I finally got the Jolly Red Giant.
(Angel appears, peeling off her clothes and mask to reveal the petitely-child-like Minnie May Hopkins. Roger begins babbling and making faces of horror.)
Angel: Oh, thank goodness, Rally. I hated running on those stilts. *notices Roger's reaction* What's with him?
Rally: He probably had some naughty fantasies about you as Angel.
May (tapping his nose): Sorry, but you actually have to pay me to do any of that stuff. I'm still a professional you know.
Rally: I thought you retired?
May: Force of habit. Where's Bill?
Rally: Agent Double-Oh-Seven-Eleven should be coming by soon.
(Beck appears in the distance, waving.)
Beck: Hey, pussycat, heard the shot - finally got the old fart?
Rally: Yes, Bill, got him. Incidentially, you look better with a goatee and short hair.
(Beck approaches and pulls a wig off, revealing ATF Agent Bill Collins.)
Bill: Aw, pussycat, was that actually a compliment?
Rally (rolling eyes): I need help hauling the body in to get my reward on him. Where's Becky?
(Vera stomps around the farmhouse.)
Vera (no accent, taking curly ash wig off and pulling glasses on): That is the last time I help you in one of your hunts, Rally! I hated using an accent!
May: And you couldn't decide which accent to use, either, Becky.
Bill (noticing Roger tearing his hair out): Hey, Roger, don't sweat it.
Roger: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!?!
Rally: You ARE thick, buddy. Me - bounty hunter. Her - my partner. Her - my informant. Him - pain-in-the-ass.
Bill: You hurt my feelings, Rally.
Rally: And I'll hurt your smirk if you don't shut up and help me with the body.
Roger: So you guys really aren't Dorothy and Angel and Beck and psycho-bitch?
May: Nope. Sorry I had to abandon you a couple of times, mister.
Roger (sighing, then pulling his hair to pull a mask off, showing kinky green hair): That's okay - my real name is Spike Seigel and I'm a bounty hunter, too. My partner Jet is posing as Dan Dastun.
May: More bounty hunters?
Rally: I got Rosewater first.
Spike: You can keep him - I got a bounty on that little red-haired kid Tami McGowen AKA the Red Rubber Ball of Death. Nasty kid.
Rally: So I hear. Good luck then.
(Rally and Spike shake hands.)
Spike: Thanks. It's been fun working with you, 'Dorothy'.
Rally: Fun here, too, 'Roger'. Kinda funny how all the bounties ended up here in this Hollywood backlot set.
Spike: I ask no questions, I just get the job done. Ciao. *saunters off*
Rally: See ya.
(Rally's group leaves with Rosewater's body.)
Bill: Well, that was pointless.
Rally: Shut up.
Bill: That's maid's dress looks pretty damn sexy on you.
Rally:
Freak.
This thread is for those who like the crossovers but not the commitment!
* * *
Roger (getting into Griffon): All right, if you want to visit Gordon Rosewater -
Dorothy: I do wish to visit him, Roger Smith. Take me.
(They drive to Ailesberry Farm. Gordon is sitting in his rocking chair on the porch.)
Gordon: I see you're back, Mr. Negotiator.
Roger: I have some questions -
BLAM!!!
(Roger blinks. Dorothy is holding a Czech357. Gordon's head has a rather large hole in it.)
Roger: Dorothy! You shot Gordon Rosewater!!!
Dorothy: Mr. Smith, I had a bounty on this clown for ages - he's wanted in Illinois for the fiasco involving the Hunts and Ragu Spaghetti Sauce War a few decades back, seems he's been doing a Soylent Green with his tomato farm.
Roger: Huh, who, what - ?
Dorothy: Oh, sorry. Name's Rally Vincent. *pulls mask off to reveal she is indeed Rally Vincent from Gunsmith Cats* I'm a bounty hunter from Chicago. *into radio* It's okay, May, I finally got the Jolly Red Giant.
(Angel appears, peeling off her clothes and mask to reveal the petitely-child-like Minnie May Hopkins. Roger begins babbling and making faces of horror.)
Angel: Oh, thank goodness, Rally. I hated running on those stilts. *notices Roger's reaction* What's with him?
Rally: He probably had some naughty fantasies about you as Angel.
May (tapping his nose): Sorry, but you actually have to pay me to do any of that stuff. I'm still a professional you know.
Rally: I thought you retired?
May: Force of habit. Where's Bill?
Rally: Agent Double-Oh-Seven-Eleven should be coming by soon.
(Beck appears in the distance, waving.)
Beck: Hey, pussycat, heard the shot - finally got the old fart?
Rally: Yes, Bill, got him. Incidentially, you look better with a goatee and short hair.
(Beck approaches and pulls a wig off, revealing ATF Agent Bill Collins.)
Bill: Aw, pussycat, was that actually a compliment?
Rally (rolling eyes): I need help hauling the body in to get my reward on him. Where's Becky?
(Vera stomps around the farmhouse.)
Vera (no accent, taking curly ash wig off and pulling glasses on): That is the last time I help you in one of your hunts, Rally! I hated using an accent!
May: And you couldn't decide which accent to use, either, Becky.
Bill (noticing Roger tearing his hair out): Hey, Roger, don't sweat it.
Roger: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!?!
Rally: You ARE thick, buddy. Me - bounty hunter. Her - my partner. Her - my informant. Him - pain-in-the-ass.
Bill: You hurt my feelings, Rally.
Rally: And I'll hurt your smirk if you don't shut up and help me with the body.
Roger: So you guys really aren't Dorothy and Angel and Beck and psycho-bitch?
May: Nope. Sorry I had to abandon you a couple of times, mister.
Roger (sighing, then pulling his hair to pull a mask off, showing kinky green hair): That's okay - my real name is Spike Seigel and I'm a bounty hunter, too. My partner Jet is posing as Dan Dastun.
May: More bounty hunters?
Rally: I got Rosewater first.
Spike: You can keep him - I got a bounty on that little red-haired kid Tami McGowen AKA the Red Rubber Ball of Death. Nasty kid.
Rally: So I hear. Good luck then.
(Rally and Spike shake hands.)
Spike: Thanks. It's been fun working with you, 'Dorothy'.
Rally: Fun here, too, 'Roger'. Kinda funny how all the bounties ended up here in this Hollywood backlot set.
Spike: I ask no questions, I just get the job done. Ciao. *saunters off*
Rally: See ya.
(Rally's group leaves with Rosewater's body.)
Bill: Well, that was pointless.
Rally: Shut up.
Bill: That's maid's dress looks pretty damn sexy on you.
Rally:
Freak.
!