[Fan Fiction] Cheap Innuendoes and Jokes (Mature Content may not be suitable for persons under 16 years of age.)

My position on the corrupt of the youth stands as follows: If you're too young for my innuendoes, you would probably not understand them. It takes a certain amount of "experience" and "knowledge" to understand them. These scenes tests out your own filthy minds. Those without one, will not comprehend them.

However, if you think that these are inappropriate, then I will ask the moderators to lock this thread. I would hate to "damage" the fragile minds of the youth on such risque scenes.

hehe we need an "Adult Swim" forum j/k!!!

Ok dokey. No, I will not lock this, but again, I will change the title of the thread with a better warning. It never had that warning until a few days ago (I wonder why I waited so long?). None the less, there will be a greater warning on it (like people will listen :rolleyes .

Sadly, if you are too young to be reading this, shame on you! Avoid this thread until you are at least 16.

Later,
Pen1300

quote:

Originally posted by pen1300 Avoid this thread until you are at least 16.

Unless you have something funny to post.

"If you can't be good, be furtive. If you can't be furtive, post in this thread."

quote:

Originally posted by A Clockwork Tomato quote: Originally posted by pen1300 Avoid this thread until you are at least 16. Unless you have something funny to post.

Now, now ACT. As much as I would like to go with this, I can't agree, because it'd be exposure.

However, it should be more like "if under 16, view at own risk" so as not to exclude peole, but give them fair warning. That way ACT's idea can come to fruition too.

EDIT: Didn't notice the title. That works too. Isn't excusionary but accomplishes the same purpose.

Dorothy sat outside Col. Dastun's office as Roger went in to conduct some business. She politely ignored their conversation until ...

Dastun: So, how are your balls working out?
Roger: Oh, great, no complaints. That technique you taught me does wonders.
D: It's always relaxing to play with one's balls when one is agitated.
R: I hear you, Dan. Although when I'm really agitated, I just throw them against a wall.
D: Don't do that! They're too delicate to be treated like that.
R: Nah, mine are heavy - here, hold them.
D: Yeah, they pack a wallop. I'm jealous for once.
R: There's no reason to be. I remember back in the academy you always had problems with the guys grabbing yours without permission.
D: Well, I don't let just anybody grind my balls.
R: Of course not.
D: Has Dorothy tried them?
R: I'm afraid she'll crush them.
D: I think it'll do her good to play with your balls.

At this point, Dorothy broke into the office and remarked, "Roger Smith, Colonel Dastun, you are both below 'louse', you are 'perverts'."

Roger looked at her, "What did we do now? Are you upset that I won't let you use my Chinese worry balls?"

HOLY CRAP

That was frickin insane!! XD

Good one Lady T. I'd love to see the look on Dorothy's face after that, or better yet hear her explaination for her being upset.

I bet O'Reily would be like...(see picture below)




lol...MORE MORE MORE!! @_@
"I can't stand it when you talk like that...Money and sex! And sex and money! I'm only human..." ~LupinIII

• Attachment: NoComment.jpg

Wow, that was incredibly original, Lady Tesser--probably one of the sickest ones I've read yet! I haven't laughed so hard since I read your husband's contribution to the thread in page one!

I like the whole "learning to drive" thing too, tvperez.

OMG, Lady Tess. You are Queen of Innuendo along with Fanfic Goddess. Watch out, Tony! Someone has come to steal your title!!!

LOL Lady Tesser!

quote:

Originally posted by Lady Tesser ...Roger looked at her, "What did we do now? Are you upset that I won't let you use my Chinese worry balls?"

And then I have to wash my brain with soap. Lye soap. With extra pumice.

Pygmalion

Great stuff, Lady Tesser.

quote:

Originally posted by Wienberg OMG, Lady Tess. You are Queen of Innuendo along with Fanfic Goddess. Watch out, Tony! Someone has come to steal your title!!!

Hey, if she wants my thorny crown, it hers for the taking.

Ok here's my go at one...disturbing yes...but hell, I gotta start off with a bang

--------------

Roger and Alex and Norman are in Roger's study argueing LOUDLY...

Roger- Alex! I'm telling you, you don't have the biggest pair of knockers!
Alex- Shows what you know Negotiator...If you looked at them recently you'd see that they are the largest in the city.
Norman- Please, keep it down. Dorothy is trying to sleep.
Roger- Norman! This guy think he's got the largest knockers in the city!
Norman- SIR!
Roger- Oh fine...he may have the largest in the city but we've got the largest outside the domes! I'm telling you--
Alex- --HA! Don't make me laugh Roger Smith. I've seen Angel's, and she's got some good ones...
Roger- Keep her out of this Alex! *turning to Norman* Norman! You saw Dorothy make her knockers right? And you installed them yourself! You saw how big they were!
Norman- Yes sir, I did. They were custom made, and everyone that passed by said that they had never seen a pair bigger than those outside the domes.

Dorothy and Angel break down the door. Angel is holding the leg of a table and Dorothy, well...she's just standing there.

Dorothy+Angel- ROGER!/ALEX!
Dorothy- You are such a pervert.
Angel- Alex...AH!! *clobbers alex with teh table leg*
Roger- Uhh...Dorothy, Angel...uhh...what's the problem. We were only trying to decide who's mansion had the largest pair of custom made door knockers...

Dorothy+Angel- x_X

-------------


*edit*
Bang?!...maybe a small firecracker I'M NEW AT THIS HAVE PITY ;.;

LTs.. Was so damn wrong.

...What's a Chinese worry ball anyway?

http://www.themodernreligion.com/health/balls.html

You twirl them around in one hand, it's supposed to reduce stress, something to do with acupuncture points in your hand, rotating the balls around increases circulation to these points in you hand.

They're called worry balls too.

good story btw Lady T

i think everyone in the world needs a set of worry balls to use! or in cause of most people on the net they they need a set bored ballls to mess with !

Lady T, Evan, those were both hilarious!
I'll have to give this another shot sometime.

Good stuff Evan.

I am not sure if this is funny, but what the hell...

---

Dorothy: Push! Push! Don’t give up. Push, Roger! Push!
Roger: ** Breathing Heavy** I’m feeling it. I don’t think I can take it anymore.
Dorothy: I thought humans were supposed to be good at this. Especially, young well-built men like yourself.
Roger: ** Breathing Heavier ** Okay, I can do it one more time.
Dorothy: Roger, is that supposed to impress me?
Roger: What does that suppose to mean?
Dorothy: Well, you are not performing to par tonight. Is there something wrong? Maybe, there’s something on your mind.
Roger: You mean I am not satisfying you?
Dorothy: Don’t get upset. I am sure you are trying your best.
Roger: That’s right!

** Moments later **

Dorothy: ** Artificial Giggle **
Roger: What’s so funny?
Dorothy: Well, I’m on top and doing all the work. You haven’t given me any effort in the last minute or so.
Roger: ** Angry ** That’s it! That’s the last time I’m letting you spot me while I am bench pressing!
Dorothy: ** Lifting the weight off of his chest and places it on the rack. ** Then, that is the last time you will be bench pressing 315 pounds. You know you can only lift 245 pounds without my help.
Roger: ** Storms out of the exercise room. ** I don’t have to hear these outrages allegations anymore.
Dorothy: ** Waits until he leaves, she lays down on the bench and effortlessly bench presses 405 pounds. ** Men, how they amuse themselves.