Who Would Win In A Fight?

Cylons did more than sit around consulting old-ass documents and plot nefariously. Cylons massacre the tottering humans.

Fire-breathing aliens versus Alien-eating monkeys.

The monkeys have the early advantage, but are awed by the aliens' command over fire, which is the one thing monkeys are yet to master. They swear their servitude to the aliens, content to eat only the sick and old aliens.

Ninjas (assasins) vs. Ninjas (motorcycles)

Ninja will use mastery of stealth and a shuriken to slash the tires of motorcycle. Assassin wins.

High beams vs. low beams.

Cylons. Totally.

Cylons are ultimate.

Battra v. Mothra

Mothra. He's creepy old school.

Parakeets vs Pigeons

Pigeons. Reference the aforementioned chibits effect.

High beams vs. low beams.

While high beams can do damage to the head and the brain, low beams can hit you and do damage below the belt.

Winner: Low beams

Natalie Portman vs. Jessica Alba

...And no, you can't reply "whoever wins, we lose."
Peace.

Jessica Alba's been in more movies and shows where she has to pretend to fight. She probably picked something up along the way.

Ryu versus Ken

Ryu has mastered the Hadou-Ken (the fireball) and Ken has mastered the Shroyu-Ken (the air dragon punch). The Hadou-Ken has a much more mystical and deeper power then the Shroyu-Ken so Ryu wins in that department. Also there's the Dark Hadou Power which Ryu can tap into, making him a fighter like Akuma (crazed and going on killing sprees). Ken has been possessed by the Orochi power but its not as powerful and that's a whole other story.

Anyway... Winner: Ryu

The Desperate Housewives vs. the girls from Sex in the City.

And no, you can't reply that they all kill each other and the television world, and the real world in general, becomes a better place for all to live.
Peace.

Can I at least say the three polygamist wives of the Hendrickson clan? No? Aww...

I'll go with The Desperate Housewives, then.

Neo v. Robocop?

(An oldie, but a goodie.)

f*** Neo, Robocop FTW.

Robocop.

So..this brings about one of the must convulted matches of all time.

ROBOCOP vs. TERMINATOR vs. ALIEN vs. PREDATOR

If this is all a single member of the species/group, than the Alien dies right off the bat. That really shouldn't need explanation.

A prime factor is what Terminator is it? Arnold, liquid, or chic? If Arnold, then he's going to win, since he fought a Predator before, but this time, he's a robot, so yeah.

In the end, the box office wins, as do the American people, for such great action scenes, with a flimsy plot.

Getting shot in the ear versus getting a divorce.

Shot in the ear would be better. Divorces and ex's are hell.

DoTA vs Enfo's

I going to have to go with DoTA, just because the spelling of it looks a helluva lot cooler.

Optimus Prime vs. The Big O
Peace.

Big-O.

Because all transformers weapons either miss the enemy, hit the ground near the enemy, or hit the enemy with little or no effect other than knocking them over.



The Men in Black vs. The Grammaton Clerics

Men in Black. They win because of their Noisy Crickets.

Saddam vs Kim Jong Ill

Kim Jong Il. Even Saddam would cower in fear before his combover.

Silly Putty vs. Superball

Silly Putty is awesome, but Superball is exactly the size of your eye socket. Superball ftw

Gorillas vs. Monkeys

Is this a trick question? I think it is. Gorillaz would win against the fake Beatles, but if its Gorillas vs. Monkeys, its Monkeys, because you can play as them in Timesplitters and they steal your baby in Yoshi's Island.



Apocalypse vs. Vin Diesel

Apocalypse is a mere caricature of Vin Diesel. Plus he apparently wears extremely homoerotic blue lipstick.

Thus, Vin Diesel, whose shining bald cranium can evoke an attack similar to Chromebuster.

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Skeletor (He-Man) vs. Mum-Ra (Thundercats)